...cranky moments - not caring that the gravy didn't taste right, whatever, I'm done),
...tired moments (dozing off in the middle of an epic Wii boxing battle at the in-laws), and alot of generally warm fuzzy feelings.
Underpinning all of this was the realization that Christmas is just different when you're a parent. I've always been one to enjoy getting just the right gifts for people, but with a child, I think its more the search for the magic gift, not necessarily the most expensive one, but the one that will light up your child's face.
BabyA is still pretty young for that, but we did manage to get a great activity centre, with spinners and tumblers and balls on wires that all three of my sister's children, aged 2, 5, and 7, played with. I am thrilled with the potential longevity of this toy.
Now that the holidays are over, I'm faced with the task of deciding what I would like to see in the New Year, for me and my little family. My biggest task, I think, will be attempting to find some stability and balance in my professional life. I don't have a permanent job, and while I would love to teach again, that depends on whether the folks over at the local college need me. Ideally, I'd love to teach a single course for at least a year or so, so that I can still spend the majority of my time with BabyA. This will also mean arranging childcare for the first time, so any suggestion you might have would be appreciated. As for our family, I think purchasing our own home is pretty high on the list. It may not happen this year, but my working would put us a lot closer.
As for personal goals, I want to keep working at this writing thing. Generally, conversation with friends, and especially my mother, has been a vehicle for articulating ideas that are important to me. Writing this blog is somewhat of a challenge, because it lacks the whetstone of another person to sharpend my thoughts. It is a different process, but I think it is an important one, and one, and I'm going to keep working on it.
I'm also working on getting in better shape physically. I know that the making and breaking of resolutions around weight loss has got to be THE major cliche in New Year's resolutions, My pregnancy with BabyA gave me the astonishing gift of a major weight loss, and I really want to use the impetus to keep this up. I've already gained some of it back, because I'm breastfeeding - OK, sidebar. You know how they say breastfeeding helps you lose weight? Well, it can, and did for me, especially at first when I had zero appetite because of the c-section. However, it turns out that breastfeeding can also cause a bit increase in appetite later on, because your body requires nutrition to create milk. Apparently when you stop breastfeeding, you can lose a fair bit of weight again, as your body readjustes. Here's hoping! Other that that, I've been trying to go the the gym regularly. GeekDad's mom usually doesn't work in the afternoons, and she's really generous with babysitting so that I can work out. She has also offered us the elliptical machine she is getting rid of, so I'm trying to find space in our family room, so that I can work out without leaving the house. I'm also thinking that taking BabyA for walks in her little sled would be a really great idea. I promise to keep you updated on my progress.
So, my list: 1 - work on the work situation, 2 - work on my writing, 3 - work on getting in shape. Should these be more concrete goals? Maybe. OK, fine tuning.
Work. OK, I'm keeping that one vague, because I'm not sure what working is going to look like post-baby.
Writing - I resolve to still be writing this blog at the end of 2009.
Weight - I'd like to lose 20 lbs by the end of 2009. I need to lose more than that, but I'm really more concerned about being in shape, and consistent slow weight loss over time is more likely to be permanent, which is what's really important to me. I want to be able to play with BabyA at the playground, not just follow her around, being all out of breath and sweaty.
Oh, a final resolution - I want to be better at keeping in touch with people. I have a tendancy to let friendships fall by the wayside as things get busy, especially with friends who don't live close enough to see them on a regular basis. This is not a good thing, and I want to change it. So I'm going now, to make some phone calls, get some addresses so I can send out family photos, and reconnect.
I hope your holidays were as happy as mine, and here's hoping that the New Year will bring happiness and satisfaction with our collective lots in life. Mmmwwaaaaahhhh!