So my friend J and I are talking at lunch the other day, and she tells me how she spent an entire Saturday working her butt off, and yet failed to finish the task she started out with in the morning. In her case, the ambition to pickle beets led to doing a quick sink of dishes, which led to a quick swipe of the stove, and to an all out oven scrub, and then cleaning the basement... you know how it goes. Or at least I do.
I start with unloading the dishwasher, and then head upstairs to collect dishes and get distracted by the dirty laundry, and then the recycling which I need to sort catches my eye, and then GeekDad is home, and I have yet to unload the dishwasher. It's like surfing the internet, where you start out with a particular topic or page or what have you, and suddenly hours have passed and you are watching Rick Astley videos and cracking up over grammatically challenged cats.
I never used to be this easily distracted, but since the birth of BabyA, I feel as though my sense of focus is on indefinate leave. I desperately hope think, or hope, that this is just a function of motherhood, and the fact that since having BabyA, I don't think I've spent more than 15 or 20 minutes doing any single task except feeding. Even playing with BabyA involves frequent changes of activity - 15 minutes of lap excercises, 10 minutes of reading a book, 15 minutes of tummy time, 5 minutes on the change table, etc., etc. On the rare occasion I am doing something for a slightly longer period of time, it's usualy with divided attention, as in holding BabyA and eating lunch, or playing with her while I try to catch a few minutes of the morning news.
I miss having focus. I miss being able to start a task and finish that same task without being dragged off to something else. I know that its part and parcel of being a parent, and I wouldn't change my life for anything, but damn it, this distracted brain of mine is going to be the death of me, I swear.